Tied to My Heart
by EditorDee
Summary: Yaoi, H/N, Sad, sweet and touching story. I like it. It came from Pip, so, R/R


Tied to My Heart  
  
By Dee  
  
**Author's Notes: SPOILER WARNING!!! Just thought I'd tell you that. This is a story that gives away a major part of the ending. I don't own Fushigi Yugi, so don't sue me, I've got no money. All I know is that I've got tuition coming up, don't know how I'm going to pay for it. Pip, thanks for helping me out of my writer's block!! I appreciate it, I don't know what I'd do without you to supply me with challenges. Check her out at Pip Malloy! Well, on with the fic.  
  
Nuriko walked through the palace. He fiddled endlessly with the red and blue scarves hanging off his dress. The bright colored pieces of silk fluttered around him, lending to the ethereal look that surrounded him. Nuriko looked down at himself, down at the dress and at his past.  
  
"It's over," he whispered to himself. He flipped his hair back over his shoulder and walked briskly back to his room. Nuriko slid the door shut and looked at himself in the mirror. "It's all over.." He scrubbed his face clean with scrubbing sands and soap, taking off all traces of make-up, removing the feminine scent from his face, hands and neck. Nuriko splashed more water onto his face, washing off the soap and sand. "Never again.." Nuriko fingered the collar of his dress. "I can't do this anymore.." He slowly pulled it off, revealing pale, smooth, ivory skin underneath. "I love you, Kourin.." He dropped the dress on the floor, standing straight up, he stared at his reflection, unmoving, frozen as a stature of pure alabaster. "But I can't be you anymore.." A single tear trickled down his cheek. "I love you, but I've never hurt so much in my life, Kourin. My heart hurts, Kourin, and I have to change. I can no longer be you." And with that, Nuriko pulled on his new clothes. It was time to rediscover himself, the man that had been lost.  
  
He glanced at the dress one last time. The scarves caught his eyes. Hotohori had given him those. Nuriko sighed. Hotohori could never love him, he wanted Miaka.he wanted a female, and he couldn't deal with the fact that another man loved him. Nuriko bent down and scooped them up. He tucked them into his pocket, keeping a hold of this one last tie, this one thing that bound him to the one person he had ever really loved.  
  
There were leaving tomorrow. They had to get to the Genbu Shinzahu before the Seiyruu seven did. Nuriko walked out of the room that had been his home for the past 15 years. He slid the door shut on his old life and stepped out into the sunshine. He had responsibilities, as a clestial warrior, a loyal subject of Konan, and as a friend.  
  
He stepped away from the room and walked away to meet the others.  
  
One of the ribbons fluttered in the breeze, caught in the doorway.  
  
***  
  
"Be safe, everyone." Hotohori was disappointed and worried, extremely worried. "We're counting on you." Hotohori watched as one by one they bade him farewell and climbed onto the ship. Nuriko was the last one to shake his hand farewell.  
  
"Nuriko." Hotohori began. He looked into the beautiful man's violet eyes.  
  
"Your highness?"  
  
Hotohori smiled. "I thought we were beyond that, Nuriko. I thought that we were friends."  
  
Nuriko smiled back. "True, Hotohori-sama, true."  
  
"Nuriko do me a favor."  
  
"Anything."  
  
"Keep them safe."  
  
"Miaka?" Nuriko asked, slightly confused.  
  
Hotohori shook his head. "Yes, but I meant all of them. Keep them all safe. Look after them for me. I'd do anything to be with you on this adventure."  
  
Nuriko shook his head. "You're needed here, Hotohori. You're the emperor. You're the strength of our country. Keep it together, let us have something to come back to." Nuriko smiled and grasped Hotohori's hand tightly. "Don't worry, leave it to me. They'll be safe."  
  
Hotohori nodded and smiled. He glanced at Nuriko's upper arm, as something brightly colored and fluttering caught his attention. "Isn't that-"  
  
Nuriko looked at his arm and smiled. "Yeah, it's my last tie to the life. I've moved on, it was time. I just wish I knew what happened to the other one."  
  
Hotohori smiled. "I'm glad you've got something to remind you of home.  
  
Nuriko nodded. "Besides, I was the only concubine to actually get a gift from you. Even if I did have to be a warrior to get them." He winked and walked towards the gang plank where the others were waiting. He turned back, "Don't worry about a thing, Hotohori, I'll keep an eye on them all!" he called back.  
  
Hotohori grinned. He waved at them all as they all laughed and waved farewell. Tauski had Nuriko in a head lock over that last comment, which Nuriko easily broke. Hotohori almost laughed. As they pulled further away, his smile died. He had the worst feeling, as if this was the last time he'd ever see them all alive. Hotohori shook his head. Thoughts such as those would only pull a man down. He turned and headed towards his carriage.  
  
***  
  
Hotohori paced the empty palace. So much life had been sucked out of it with everyone gone. Eventually, he found himself standing outside of Nuriko's old rooms. He admired the view of the garden from the porch for a moment, before turning to leave. Once again, the bright red and blue silk caught his eye. The second scarf was stuck in the door. Hotohori plucked it out of the frame. He fingered the soft fabric, gently, remembering everyone, especially Nuriko.  
  
Nuriko was always there for him. And while he had never thought of him in that way before, Nuriko was more than a friend. In some ways, he meant as much to Hotohori as Miaka did. But Miaka had Tamahome, who did he have?  
  
The answer came as he silently caressed soft silk. He had Nuriko, he always had, he'd just never realized it before. He brought the scarf to his nose and breathed in deeply. It smelled like.like Nuriko did. A slightly floral scent, musky, male, and .Hotohori shook his head. He couldn't describe it. It just was.  
  
Hotohori wrapped the scarf around his hand and headed back to the throne room.  
  
***  
  
Nuriko caressed his scarf and silent tears welled up in his eyes. He'd broken his promise to Hotohori. He'd said he's protect them all. But how could he protect them if he was dead?  
  
Tears spilled out just as his blood did. They stained pale cheeks, as his blood stained the pure white snow.  
  
"I'm sorry, Hotohori-sama, my love. I'm sorry," Nuriko whispered.  
  
"NURIKO!!!" He smiled. Enter Miaka and Tamahome. If only he'd known them all sooner. If only he'd found this kind of love earlier. He loved them all. He had just discovered this and now he was going to lose it again.  
  
"NURIKO? NURIKO!!!!"  
  
No, he wouldn't lose these feelings. Ever. Nuriko smiled to himself. This kind of love lived on forever.  
  
As he began to slip into death, he clutched the scarf closer to him. 'I love you, Hotohori-sama. I want you to be happy. I'll always be there for you. Always, my love!' And with that, he slipped further away.  
  
"NOOOOOOO!!!!"  
  
'Miaka, Tamahome, mina, I'm sorry I couldn't protect you all, but my last gift to you is entrance into the cave. I love you. I love you all. Miaka. Hotohori..'  
  
"NURIKOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!"  
  
***  
  
"Nuriko!" Hotohori sat straight up. "No, Kami-sama! No, please don't let it be so!" Tears streaked down his cheeks. He felt it. The loss. Nuriko wasn't there anymore. He was gone. Forever. He could feel it, the loss of his life force, that one which was so familiar, so unique, the one he was so accustomed to. "Nuriko." Hotohori choked out. He put his head in his hands and allowed the sobs to overtake him.  
  
The scarf was wrapped tightly around his hand, catching the tears.  
  
***  
  
"Hotohori-sama? Hotohori-sama?"  
  
A voice was calling to him. It was his voice. Hotohori looked up to see Nuriko standing before him.  
  
"My lord, I have one last gift to give you."  
  
A picture formed in front of Hotohori. She looked so much like Nuriko, it was uncanny.  
  
"Her name is Houki. She'll love you as I wished I could have. She'll be there for you. This is my last wish, is for you to be happy, Hotohori- sama."  
  
Hotohori looked into Nuriko's eyes. "She could never replace you."  
  
Nuriko smiled serenely, tears building in his eyes. "She's not meant to replace me, but love you as you deserve to be loved, to give you what I could not."  
  
Hotohori nodded. "I understand." He reached towards Nuriko who was just out of reach. "I do love you, Nuriko."  
  
Nuriko's smile trembled as emotions were harder to contain. "I know your highness, I know." He leaned forward and placed two fingers on the scarf still wrapped abound Hotohori's hand. Hotohori could swear he felt a ghost- like pressure, where the fingers, cloth and his skin were all connected, making him close his hand over the scarf. "Keep this, sir, as a reminder of how much I loved you. I thank you, for everything."  
  
Hotohori nodded, tears streaming down his face.  
  
Nuriko smiled. "The only thing I'm sorry about is that I couldn't protect them. I failed in the one thing you asked me to do."  
  
Hotohori shook his head. "No, you saved them all, and you saved me as well." Hotohori tried to dash away the tears but more soon followed.  
  
Nuriko chuckled. "Even crying, you're still the most beautiful man I've ever seen, or had the pleasure of knowing." It just made Hotohori cry all harder as Nuriko slowly faded from his sight.  
  
"I love you," Hotohori whispered.  
  
"I love you, too, my emperor."  
  
***  
  
The final battle was over. At last, Hotohori could rest. He'd lost to Nakago, but at least he'd wounded him. He was ready. The only regret he had was that he was unable to see his unborn son.  
  
Nuriko held out a hand to him. "Ready, Hotohori-sama? Miaka and the others will finish this. They'll get him and they'll win."  
  
Hotohori nodded and smiled. "I know they will." He took one last look back at them, all kneeling around his body, then turned back to Nuriko. "I kept it," he said as he held up his wrist.  
  
"And I kept mine." Nuriko held up his arm.  
  
Hotohori leaned down and tenderly kissed Nuriko on the lips.  
  
Nuriko sighed happily. "We've got eternity together."  
  
"Let's begin it now."  
  
The two clasped hands and slowly disappeared.  
  
Two scarves fluttered to the ground, laying on top of one another, atop the open book Universe of the Four Gods.  
  
Miaka blinked and picked them up. "Nuriko.Hotohori." She closed her hand and held them close to her heart.  
  
-FIN-  
  
Second Author's notes: Once again, thanks Pip! I love you. See, I finished it real quick! I stayed up till 3.30 in the morning to finish this for you. Alright, so it was a little OOC at times, but it's my fic!! Gimme a break, besides, they work together and I didn't feel like doing a happy ending fic, because reality is: they die. Well, anyway, sorry if I spoiled it for anyone, but I did warn ya'll. Please Read and Review, it always helps to get constructive criticism, but please recall, I wrote this at 3 am on a Wednesday night with a 9.30 class coming up.it sucks. Any way, thanks for reading. If you want to email me, you can get the address really easily, so anywho, right, I've rambled enough, time for me to go to bed! I've got an exam at 12 tomorrow, damn college.  
  
~Dee 


End file.
